Twerking Hard in the East Village: GOOD TIMES: BILLY BEYOND, BACK FROM BEYOND

Much like the "artists" Tag Team who wrote that early 90s booty anthem Whoomp! There It Is, DJ Billy Beyond is an old (school) fool who's so cool. He famously gave my good friend DJ Will his first taste at DJing for a dance floor back in the day and was kind enough to lend his talents to us last Wednesday evening at our weekly Wednesday Good Times party at Eastern Bloc.

DJ Ryan Heir (he doesn't have a proper DJ name. Sorry!) had another gig that night but popped in early to say haaaaaaay cuz we also hosted an early evening bye bye party for Sean Spalding, who now resides on the dewy mountains of Seattle.

By the way, no clear cut music theme and 64 photos to caption is gonna be a bit of a doozy. Just sayin' that now. Oh, and Kelvin called in "sick" to work this particular Wednesday so Rob the bar back and I did most of the shooting.

Loving the matching jewfros. Happy belated Purim everybody!

Hare Krishnas love Good Times too.

Ian (right) and Good Times newcomer Andrew, who really let us have it with that furry Russian hat even though it was hot like Mexico rejoice up in the Bloc last week.

Speaking of Mexico, guess who's gonna be in Mexico City very very soon? ME! Don't miss me too much Kevin the coatchecker (who is slowly plotting to take over Good Times and make every Wednesday a Britney Spears party. I can't take it take it take no morrrrrrre!)

NEWSFLASH! Rob now has his own private bedroom out in Brooklyn and is ready to break his new bed in. Now accepting applications.

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MIKEY F! Mikey (left, with James V.) celebrated his 28th birthday pretty much from Wednesday night till Sunday night and I was right there beside him as he drooled and dreamt about things he would do with all the straight male models that showed up at his apartment Saturday evening.

WHAMMY KISS!

Good Times with really good hair gel.

Lucio (left) has a little more free time to party hardy now that he's left his long time fashion house to start up his own clothing label in the fall. He's also the unofficial promoter for our April 13 Led Zeppelin Good Times with guest DJ and birthday girl Lina.

PLEASE DONT GO. We miss Sean S. (in the half harness) so much already. Even though she's lived in New York for like, 10,000 years, we're already feeling the fallout of not having this gem of a party person now. And we hear that Mark (left) is the next to go! Major frowny face.

Gary (left), doing the opposite of showing his zany new spectacles. You'll just have to catch up live one Wednesday soon if you wanna see them.

Miss Natasha Raye—aka Natasha "Everybody's Gurl" Artis, aka Natashanista, aka Big Booty Tash—made a rare Good Times appearance, though she also promised to come back each and every week AND do a surprise performance in the very near future. NOT TO BE MISSED.

Billy! Billy Beyond was absolutely beyond. His friend sort of looks exactly like Mikey L., which probably means Mikey and I will be hanging in random DJ booths many years from now doing exactly this.

Not only did Billy turn it out with the music but he showed us all up by donning this kimono he's had since he was eight years old.

Did I miss the memo on Japanese-inspired evening wear? Stunning as ever, Mrs. Ladyfag.

As good a time as ever (wink wink) to let you know that we've staffed a very special DJ known throughout the land as DJ Dandy Lion to head up our first ever 420 party on 4/20. Mikey (center) and Ryan are already stocking up on Kettle Chips.

Rumor has it that Darren's boyfriend Dirk will be in town very very soon to party with us and simultaneously make us feel very small and weak.

Adam (right) was giving SHOWS on Wednesday. In fact, there's like, 50 photos of Adam that I had to edit out but I'm loving the side eye she's getting from Mr. Suit & Tie in this one. Carrying!

Looks like Mr. Suit & Tie will be flying Jason (left) to a European locale one day soon. Or so he's hoping.

Oh, hizies GRAHAM NORTON. This Good Times celebrity sighting was kind of fierce and kind of uneventful since apparently no one in America knows who Graham Norton is. But he had a good time nonetheless. Trust.

Lucio loves Joshes. Here is the proof.

I took all of these photos while Billy was DJing which somehow tend to me portraits amidst the crowd rather than the boob biting you're used to with Kelvin's photography. Hopefully he won't still be "sick" next week when Michael Magnan guests at a surprise Good Times (aka I play the entire new Britney Spears album Good Times).

Move over Ryan McNally because there's a new Little Ryan in town (Ryan R.) and he has yet to discover creatine like Ryan M.

James (left) and Michael, my one devoted podcast listener. If you haven't heard, I've been posting Twerking Radio podcasts on iTunes for free download (search "Sparber" and filter for podcasts) and four episodes in, I swear that Michael is our only listener. But he loves 'em so we'll keep makin' em.

ATTENTION THESE TWO: We'll be doing a bearded drag Good Times on April 27 and we're inviting any and all men with fierce ass beards to perform. The song doesn't even have to have words (Tequila!) but if you'd like, you can also lip sync for your lyyyyyfe.

DUDE WITH A CIGARETTE THROUGH HIS EAR PIERCING. COMING THROUGH.

Somehow, the Robyn has been the hairstyle of choice for ladies who've passed through Good Times in the past year.

Pretty sure Josh said "DELETE THAT" when I snapped this photo but I think he looks pretty good here so I'll just have to deal with him complaining to me at our next party. Love you Josh!

In addition to all the other celebrations, this was also Paul C.'s birthday night out, though I'm sure he got up to no good at his weekend birthday party as well.

Feel my muthafuckin' bass in your face.

WELCOME BACK RYAN C.! We have missed you dearly in these long cold winter months and we're very excited you are back to show off your big guns. Side note: why is every person named Josh, Ryan, Kevin and Michael at our party?

The rare once-a-year night out for this trio but certainly a night to remember.

Loved his XXXL button down look.

Idan (right) has seriously been getting hotter by the day as he wave bye bye to our beloved Sean. ("Please don't go.")

Harriet is seriously coming for Britney in that new Till The End of the World video. And I'm seriously coming for those pants that Harriet is wearing because they are unbelievably gorgeous (and probably $8000).

Graham Norton totally photobombed my good friend Jon (right) and Sultana, who promised to perform her original dance track No Show Lover at an upcoming Good Times.

I'm feeling good from my head to my shoes, know where I am going and I know what to do,
I've tidied up my point of view, I've got a new attitude!

One of many unknown and unexpected cuties at Good Times that evening.

Andrew (center) even sent me a follow-up email telling me what a good time he had at Good Times. I was like, gurl, the name don't lie.

Albert (right), attempting to give even more dudes a "ride home in his Jag." Also loving the Palestinian Keffiyeh, though being the biggest zionist I know, I'm not sure Albert is aware of its significance.

I GOT FIVE ON IT.

Cesar, succumbing to the dark and mystical powers that is a slightly inebriated Adam.

You are going to d.i.e. when you hear Big Scot do his metal rendition of Rihanna's S&M. I'm trying to get him to perform it at an upcoming Good Times, perhaps at my birthday party on May 4.

New York's first nightlife couple. Well actually, that'd be Ladyfag and Rainblow. Make that New York's number two nightlife couple.

Hotness at the bar (and I'm not talking about Darren for once).

And even more cuteness at the bar. (Yes, there's something cute and boyish about wearing a backpack and a baseball cap to a party. Till you try move past that person.)

DJ Will was the unofficial promoter of Billy Beyond's party because Billy used to hook Will up with DJ spots at the original Beige party which happened in Los Angeles I believe. Now, like all of us, Will is a Billy Beyond devotee.

Shakin' it for daddy he wants more more more.

Face, face, face.

Telfar is letting you have it with those old school earphones. Fashion, hennnnny.

Idan (left) and Jeffrey F., who may or may not live in hotels but is also letting you have it with yet another headphone look. Headphone fashion alert!

Carrying! No, literally. As in Adam was literally carrying dude in the white frames by the neck at this point. But I think he liked it.

I don't have a good feeling about this.

My favorite nightlife person of all time ever, photographer Jeff, who is number one in my book to ki ki with about anyone and everyone because Jeff knows EV'RY-TING.

Willie and his lovely lady friend who's name I will never remember because he introduced her to me at 230am and names don't go to the proper storage spot at that hour.

Hands across Good Times!

He was none too happy to realize his photo had been snapped in front of such lewd decor but I assured him it was all in good taste.

Speaking of all in good taste.

Thank you x 1,000 to our sensei Billy Beyond, who gave the children an education in music and even played me some Devo which is always a surefire way to my heart.

The one on the left came bearing love from the DJ Maiden of San Francisco, Miss Juanita More, who will be making her Good Times DJ debut on May 11 and we are very very very very very eagerly awaiting her arrival.