Monday, March 31, 2008


Last week, I temporarily abandoned working out with the straight East Village Dominican set to try the luxe gay mecca known as David Barton. Located in the heart of Chelsea, Barton is an upscale "co-ed" gym that really has no need for a women's locker room (but the men's is super swank, above right). The main weight room was all dudes, all the time. One told me to smile while I was working out (???). Another told me I was sexy and asked if I had a boyfriend while we took turns on the pull-up machine.

Not that I'm complaining. Barton feels more like a club than a gym and I stayed much longer than my usual hour due to the numerous distractions and worked out much harder in hopes of impressing the regular clientele. They also invite DJs to spin sets during prime time workout hours, which was why I checked out the gym in the first place: I'm DJing at David Barton in Chelsea this Tuesday. 530 - 930pm. Expect to hear lots of Olivia Newton-John's Physical and other gay workout music.

Monday - The Cock (upstairs), 11pm - 4am
Tuesday - David Barton Gym, Chelsea, 530 - 930pm
Wednesday - Good Times @ Eastern Bloc, 10pm - 4am
Friday - The Cock (basement), 12 - 4am
Saturday - Kabin, 11pm - 2am

Diana Ross - Muscles

Sunday, March 30, 2008


Lara Flynn Boyle will always be Donna Hayward to me. I was a Twin Peaks fanatic in high school after watching the entire series at my friend's house on laserdisc. (I am also a laserdisc fanatic, but that's another story.) I loved me some Sherilyn Fenn, Madchen Amick and Lara Flynn Boyle.

So young! So pretty! Did you know Lara was only 20 when she starred in Twin Peaks, which I recently acquired the Definitive Gold Box Edition of on DVD? I also visited Snoqualmie Falls, site from the opening sequence, and the Double R diner in Washington State once upon a time.

I know Donna, er, I mean Laura isn't 20 anymore. She's 38 and has been married twice after dating such Hollywood hunks as Jack Nicholson (age 70) and David Spade. Gross. But after a few appearances on Awful Plastic Surgery, she showed up in Beverly Hills last night looking like this:

Ack! Bring back Donna Hayward! It must be tough to age in Hollywood but the collagen injections, cheek implants and whatever else Lara did to fuck up her face are not helping. She looks like she's been straight up beat in the face by the log lady. Here's how I'd like to remember her:



Monday, March 24, 2008


Roisin! Roisin! Roisin! Impossible to pronounce yet so sweet on the ears. Last Wednesday at Good Times @ Eastern Bloc, we celebrated all things Roisin Murphy (except Ruby Blue, which I accidentally left at home).

HOT COUPLE ALERT! Jacob (left) and Jon just moved to New York from San Diego and are as sweet as they are handsome. Even the big girl in the background thinks so.

Frank (center) made a triumphant return to Good Times now that he doesn't have to stay home and watch Project Runway every Wednesday. He's going to help throw a lesbo rock party with me in April when Jimmy's away (think Liz Phair, Luscious Jackson and Aimee Mann).

It is always a delight to see Erik's (right) smiling face, even when he looks like he's about to pass out.

David, Danny and maybe another D-starting name (from left) rocked baseball cap prime color scheme realness!

When people wearing engagement rings shun the camera, it only makes me more suspicious.

Jacob (left), slapping his friend for not knowing that Roisin's latest album, Overpowered is manna from heaven, especially for the gays.

"Oh lawdy, I do declare!" (said in a Rue McClanahan accent).

I'm not sure if Kelvin (not pictured) asks patrons to lick one another when he's photographing him but that's what its beginning to seem like. a.k.a. I want every caption to say "TASTES LIKE CHICKEN!"

These folks look like Janet Jackson night might have been more their speed, but I'm sure they were having fun nonetheless.

Our photographer Kelving (right), who also loves to pose in pictures doing what you see here.

The boys of summer are coming. Boys of Summer is like, my favorite song ever, btw.


I'm sure he's flipping off someone he met on Manhunt who didn't respond to his e-wink.

I love a man who wears a pink tie. As in, the color pink, not from that fancy schmancy store Pink, though I'm not mad at men like that either.

Mikey (right, with Kelvin) has the most seductive droopy eyes. Someone told me that droopy eyes usually come with matching droopy/slanted nipples. True or false?

This photo was not cropped in any way, shape or form. Just a good ol' "bend over and pose" kinda shot.

Five Jaeger shots to the wind.

Tim (left, with Michael and Kevin) just back from India, which he found stinky and unglamorous. Sadly, he didn't make it to Bombay, the most amazing city on earth.

Since we're nearing the one year anniversary of Good Times, which we're having a party for this Wednesday, March 26th, Kevin and I reminisced about how used to roll up at 2am and stay till close. Now he has one of those annoying "day job" things.

Cameron's Backstreet Boys shirt almost rivals Eric's cuteness, but not quite.

I'm sure this guy is more of a Moloko fan than a Roisin Murphy fan but can still get into the Let Me Know remixes.

That's me (left) and Pablo. Every time we go out, people ask us if we're related so I've just started saying yes.

Adam (right), about to make this poor dude on the left smell the wrath of his armpit.


How is it that NO ONE took a picture of Chris from the front, in trendy red and black plaid no less?!

Lulu (right) and his new dude Chris, mid-argument about who's gonna be the top tonight.

I am wisin' and hopin' and thinkin' and prayin' that his tongue is not actually touching her boot.

Lulu's ex-boyfriend Andrew was in town from Missouri or some non-coastal place like that. When he and Lulu met, it was mohawk lovvvvvvve, at first sight (a la Kylie).

These two started the dance party, which didn't stop till 6 in the morn. Or four, to be precise.

Good Times loves Daniel Nardicio and everything he stands for, which is mostly raunchy gay sex.

V-neck tshirt season is nearly upon us people! Make a mad dash to American Apparel when you get a chance.

Late night portraitures, starring Daniel Nardicio in the background.

Apart from our one year anniversary this Wednesday night, March 30 will mark the five-year anniversary of no smoking in all NYC bars. Thank you Mayor Bloomberg! My lungs are deeply grateful.

Tommy (left) and Kevin, sharing a stick of bubble gum. Or something.

Kelvin and co-DJ Jimmy, celebrating the smoking ban outdoors! In the cold!

Hola Kevin Graves (right)! Please me so kind as to pose with our moving mannequin, Kelvin. Thank you.

NOTE: Red beards do NOT always mean fire crotch below. I speak from personal experience.

The award-winning Puerto Rican ass that is Kelvin's.

Who knew that one of the Backstreet Boys was actually at our party?! Not me.

The handsomeness on the left is apparently named Jason. I know this because I took notice of him quite quickly, before a friend informed me that they recently started "hanging out." FINDERS KEEPERS.

Have I mentioned that Chris looks like a young Al Pacino? I probably write that every time he comes out, but its true!

My late night boys crew. Is Abercrombie & Fitch still in business or can that shirt officially be classified as vintage?

These two were none too happy when I snapped their picture. Or maybe they were just mad that I wasn't playing Bauhaus.


Dance party USA! I'd like to think we were playing old school Deee Lite at this point in the night.


MORE HOT LESBO ACTION! Just kidding. These are two dudes sitting alongside the always picture-perfect Kyle on the left.

Lesbians would never make this kind of public display of affection. Or maybe these two were just "overpowered."

Kelvin, on the other hand, loves to make public displays of everything. What's up with that wet spot on his undies? Oh well.